Now Playing - The Movie Review Podcast

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Hitman: Agent 47

Agent 47 is back and balder than ever in a 2015 relaunch of the Hitman franchise.  Can Homeland actor Rupert Friend make a stronger impression than Timothy Olyphant as the legendary cloned assassin trades bullets with wannabe Wolverine Zachary Quinto? And can new agent Hannah Ware really be 43 times better than the boys if it takes her 43 years to locate sickly bioengineer Ciaran Hinds? Trust Justin, Stuart, and Arnie to protect listeners from head trauma as they navigate another treacherous video game adaptation. Listen now!

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Hitman

Justin, Arnie, and Stuart use the 42nd installment of the Now Playing Arcade to celebrate being 47… that is, video game Hitman: Codename 47. Die Hard 4 villain Timothy Olyphant hoped to make a killing at the box office when he suited up to play this mysterious baldie with a barcode back in Thanksgiving 2007.  But can his follically-challenged assassin deliver enough carnage and believable romantic chemistry with beautiful Russian target Olga Kurylenko to satisfy audiences not holding a joystick?  Find out when you slip on some headphones and Listen Now.

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Max Payne

Mark Wahlberg aimed to please fans of the popular shooter Max Payne, but his 2008 movie adaptation missed its target audience and clipped the wings of a potential franchise. Will this vigilante cop have better luck scoring points with Now Playing Arcade hosts Justin, Arnie, and Stuart?  And can they coherently link the man who murdered Max’s family to a wild conspiracy involving hallucinogenic street drugs and C-list celebrities Mila Kunis, Chris O’Donnell, and singer Nelly Furtado? Your best shot at finding answers is to Listen Now!       

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Silent Hill: Revelation

It’s homecoming weekend in Silent Hill, as teenage runaway Sharon reunites with her darkside doppelganger Alessa for a 2012 sequel in 3-D!  Will the Revelation that cultists have kidnapped adoptive father Sean Bean provide a good reason for moviegoers to head back into the fog and solve new puzzles? And is Game of Thrones hunk Kit Harington much help in the fight against Pyramid Head, a lunatic Malcolm McDowell, and a staff of faceless demon nurses?  Find out when you take another merry-go-round ride on the Now Playing Arcade!

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Silent Hill

The Now Playing Arcade finally has a reason to put down the flamethrower!  Hosts Arnie, Stuart, and Justin stumble through the falling ash of Uwe Boll films to arrive at Silent Hill - the rare video game movie to earn box office success. Will stranded mother Radha Mitchell find any Green Arrows while searching the West Virginian ghost town for her missing adoptive daughter Sharon?  And is that a pyramid, or a dunce cap, atop the head of the sword-wielding monster that follows close behind her? Quiet your questioning mind with another podcast review!

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Postal

Notorious filmmaker Uwe Boll has gone Postal - firing back at his many critics with a raunchy adaptation of one of the most offensive video games ever made. Can one unlucky Dude with a shotgun (Zack Ward) stop a Taliban plot to spread bird flu, and earn the respect of his trailer park? Or will he simply kill his cheating wife, cult leader uncle (David Foley), a corrupt cop, that rude lady at the welfare office, and Uwe Boll himself playing the owner of a Nazi-themed amusement park? Find out if Now Playing can make peace with it all when you listen now!

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House of the Dead II

Uwe Boll’s reviled adaptation of Sega’s House of the Dead video game won’t stay dead, lumbering back to life with a SyFy Channel sequel. AMS agents Nightingale (Saw 2 babe Emmanuelle Vaugier) and Ellis (Ed Quinn) lead a team of soldiers into a college campus overrun with “hyper-sapiens”.  Can they retrieve a blood sample from Patient Zero, and cure the zombie outbreak, before Dick Cheney decides to drop the bomb?  And do Justin, Arnie, and Stuart see the franchise evolving now that it’s in new directorial hands? Listen and find out!

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House of the Dead

The 1996 shooter House of the Dead invited gamers to pick up light guns and mow down scores of charging zombies.  But the 2003 movie adaptation has podcasters Justin, Arnie, and Stuart taking aim once again at immortal writer/director Uwe Boll.  Should bad movie lovers take that boat ride with Clint Howard, and attend a Sega-sponsored rave on Seattle’s Island of the Dead? Or will the hangover live forever in viewers’ minds?  You’ll find out if the Now Playing Arcade escapes this overturned porta-potty when you listen now!

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D.O.A. - Dead Or Alive

D.O.A. brought a healthy dose of T&A to fighting games in 1996, and the same holds true for the campy 2006 movie adaptation.  Everything jiggles when a trashy American wrestler (Jamie Presley), shinobi ninja princess (Devon Aoki), and slinky British cat burglar (Holly Valance) compete in the lucrative Dead Or Alive competition. Will the vixens put aside their differences and unite against Eric Roberts as he uses nanotechnology to extract and sell off their combat skills? Hear the Now Playing Arcade hosts receive another ass whuppin’ when you Listen Now!  

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Tekken 2: Kazuya’s Revenge (Movie Review)

Because the first Tekken movie didn’t prove fatal, podcasters Arnie, Justin, and Stuart must now survive Kazuya’s Revenge!  But could the emotionless amnesiac drifting through this low budget prequel be the same Kazuya who so rashly seized control of the Iron Fist Tournament last time?  And what good could possibly come from partnering with future champ Bryan Fury (Gary Daniels) to take down the assassin school that trained them?  Things are gonna get messy, even with a crazed janitor mopping up the arena. Assume a defensive position and Listen Now! 

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